The Three Bears

Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in her little chair at the table. She looks into her little bowl. It is empty.

"Who's been eating my porridge?!!" she squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. "Who's been eating MY porridge?!!" he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells...

"For Christ's sake, how many times do we have to go through this with you idiots?

It was Mummy Bear, who got up first,

It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house,

It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee,

It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold air to fetch the newspaper,

It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table,

It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher and put everything away, and

it was Mummy Bear who put the friggin' cat out, cleaned the litter box and filled the cat's water and food dish.

Now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence, listen good, cause I'm only gonna say this one more time..........

........I HAVEN'T MADE THE FUCKING PORRIDGE YET!!!!"